Are We Having an Affair?

by Pastor Steven McReynolds(1)

Therefore, get your minds ready for action by being fully sober, and set your hope completely on the grace that will be brought to you when Jesus Christ is revealed. Like obedient children, do not comply with the evil urges you used to follow in your ignorance, but, like the Holy One who called you, become holy yourselves in all of your conduct, for it is written,“You shall be holy, because I am holy. – 1 Peter 1:13-16

We have all heard the terms crawling in bed with our sins, or sleeping with disaster. How often have we turned from God to seek our own pleasures, to fill the desires of our heart with the pleasures of the flesh? 

When a person has a relation outside of marriage they betray their spouse in the form of infidelity. It is no different when we as the bride of Christ go outside our spiritual marriage with Christ to indulge in other pleasures. We continually watch programs, listen to music, and indulge in things that we know are not of God, such as Christians professing karma and new age concepts. We condone things we know God would not and does not approve of, both in our personal lives as well as in our careers. We allow ourselves to be seduced by the enemy for the satisfaction of our own desires, forsaking the vows we made with Christ.Why have we been deceived to think our relationship with Christ is different than our physical marriage? We have been blinded by the enemy so long that our eyes have been closed to God’s truth.

Stop and think about this for a moment.

How can we as man of God continue to lead our families if we fail to recognize what we are doing? Do not be deceived. By doing these things, we commit spiritual adultery. We put ourselves and our desires above those of God. And we not only teach, but also show our families the way to do it. It reminded me of what I see when I travel around the country.

I spend a lot of time on the road traveling from place to place. In my travels and my work, I meet a lot of men that are away from home for long periods of time. A lot of these men are married, but live a lifestyle that resembles a single mans life. I see or hear of a lot of infidelity nearly every day, both to the spouses at home as well as to our Lord Jesus Christ.

So my questions for you my brothers are these:

  • Where do we draw the line?
  • When do we take a stand to be true to both our wife and our God?
  • Will we give godly men the authority to hold us accountable?
  • Will we teach our children to stay true to the vows we take in marriage and with God?

Below are a few scriptures that refer to vows:

Eccl. 5:4

“When you make a promise to God, don’t delay in following through, for God takesno pleasure in fools. Keep all the promises you make to him.”

Numbers 30:2

“When a man makes a vow to the LORD or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.”

Deuteronomy 23:21

“If you make a vow to the LORD your God, do not be slow to pay it, for the LORD your God will certainly demand it of you and you will be guilty of sin.”

Proverbs 20:25

   “It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows.”

There are two paragraphs in Paul’s letters to Timothy and Titus that give us a powerful profile for testing our maturity levels in Christ. (1 Tim. 3:1-7, Titus 1:5-10). These scriptures depict spiritual qualifications from both letters. This was Paul’s maturity profile for the leaders that he would appoint:

  • Overall spiritual maturity (a well rounded man).
  • Above reproach (a man of good repute).
  • The husband to one wife (morally pure).
  • Temperate (balanced in words and actions).
  • Prudent (wise and humble).
  • Respectable (good role model).
  • Hospitable (unselfish and generous).
  • Able to teach (communicates sensitively in a nonthreatening and non-defensive manner.
  • Not addicted to wine (not addicted to substances).
  • Not self willed (not self centered and controlling).
  • Not quick tempered (void of anger that becomes sinful).
  • Not pugnacious (not abusive).
  • Gentle (sensitive, loving and kind).
  • Peaceable (non argumentative and non divisive).
  • Free from love of money (non materialistic).
  • Manages his own household well (a good husband and father).
  • Loving what is good (pursues godly activities).
  • Just (wise, discerning, non prejudiced and fair).
  • Devout (holy, devoted to God).
  • Self-controlled (disciplined).

Men are called to lead both in the church and the home, but we must lead by example through following–following the commandments of God. Let us today choose to lay down our sinful ways, lay down our adulterous flesh, lay down the infidelities of the world, and take to heart the vows we made to Christ.

Forgive us O Lord and restore us unto you. Remove the tarnished robe from us and cleanse us from our unrighteousness. In Jesus Name, Amen

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